Intake was ehh today. Started good ended bad but what the hell its almsot friday. Home alone for the next 2 nights so that means drugs, guys, binging and hopefully purging. Im sick of being fat but I have the shittiest will power ever. Tomorrows the 16th and that was always T and I's day (fucked up grammer, please ignore) I dont know what to wear tomorrow, everything makes me look fat. I hate life sometimes. I might try to purge after I finish these poptarts.. not sure yet. I had a total meltdown and anxiety attack today. That was a blast. I really dont know whats going on anymore. A made a comment about my diet pills and how "they're obviously not good since they make you feel sick. you dont need them anyways, plus you dont want to turn into one of those fucked up twigs. I wouldn't even talk to you if you turned into that." .......little does she know how badly I want to become that, a skinny twig girl with motives and thoughts nobody else understands.
Comment Responses:
Since im so shitty and consistantly doing them im just going to start from my last post. To all the other comments before thank you so much. I love hearing from you guys. I post, go to bed, wake up the morning and check to see your lovely presence I so desperatly love.
The Road Not Quite Traveled post:
Skeleton Strong: My exercise is terrible. I hardly do it and I hate every second of it. Thanks so much <3 I know it happens to all of us but it seems like I do it allllll the time.
Ahava: I'm out of control lately I wish I could control what I eat but if its in reach it's in my mouth soon after. That milk stuff sounds disgusting.. it totally might work <3 Thank you
Rinnstein Prinzessin: I heard liquid works well. I'm going to make sure to drink water next time because diet pepsi was terribleeeee it turned my stomach into a fizzy carbonated olive juice mixture. It was terrible. Thanks for the advice <3
Karolina: Before I could do it so well I don't understand why now is anny different but im determined to make it work again. I know its not good but my willpower is that of a 5 year old being tempted with candy. I've heard a little about a saltwater flush but not a lot. It sounds strange but it might be something I look into. Thanks for the comment <3
<3 I LOVE YOU LADIES.
no prob! it really is GROSS, like seriously. i thought the mint flavor would be good, but HELL no! youre so lucky you get to be left alone! UGH :( what kind of diet pills are those, anyways? i need to get my paws on some :D
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